Thursday, October 13, 2011

**Hidden Blessings**

So, I haven't written a blog in a while but I feel as thought I should only write when something compels me to or if I just need to vent. Lately, it has started to happen. The issue most chemo patients fear and become anxious about. Hair loss. Until recently, it has only thinned out but I have decided to wear hats and head scarves in order to not have to deal with my hair every day. Out of everything I've been through so far, this is probably one of the hardest things I've had to go through. Not to sound shallow by any means, but for a girl/woman, her hair is a part of her identity. It's an important part in being and feeling feminine. I know it will eventually grow back but the visual image of a pile of hair in the trash can is slightly depressing. Thank God that I have the most amazing friends and family in my life. They have never once treated me differently or made me feel like a charity case and I could not be more grateful for that. Pretty recently, a new and very special person has come into my life. Not only does he make me incredibly happy, but he reassures me and reminds me all the time that I am beautiful with or without hair; scars or no scars. For so long, I thought to myself (not wanting to really mention it to anyone) "Who is ever going to want to be with me with all of this crazy stuff going on in my life?" God heard me and sent this amazing person into my life, even though he had really been there all along. But as we all know, timing is everything and I think God figured that this was a pretty good time for us to finally find each other :) How lucky am I?! I feel like one of the most blessed people in this world. So why am I complaining about such an insignificant thing as hair? Good question...